(中文請往下看）
I had an "A-ha" moment the other day at the supervision class from my dear teacher Dr Catherine Shainberg. She said everything is energies before they manifest in the physical world. Somewhere in between this process are images. When we listen to music, images would pop up in our mind involuntarily. This is an epiphany to me no less. So whatever we experienced through our five senses, images are the first things that show up after we internalised these experiences. In another word, images are the interface between energies and manifestations.
I have been a practitioner in various spiritual and energy healing systems since 2011 and somehow I find there is something lacking in the healing process. This is not a criticism to any system, just a personal observation from my own experience. In working with these modules, the goal is to change energies from the source. We always use the analogy of a tree to explain to students and clients. We are (or our issues, and our physical symptoms and manifestations) are the leaves, fruits, flowers and trunks of a tree. If we only tackle the symptoms, we are only cutting off the leaves and trunks, the roots are intact and the same tree will grow back. Therefore we have to go straight to the source, which is the roots of the tree, and remove the cause that gives rise to the symptoms. These systems work efficaciously to bring us back to the roots of different programmings, patterns, belief systems, and perceptions which are very often brought over from past lives, ancestral lineages and childhood experiences etc. Using the same logic, we focus on what kind of energies we are vibrating towards the things/goals/creations we desire. Here is what I find lacking. I cleared and transformed the negative energies, then I expect a positive result will manifest. Sometimes the shift is instantaneous, but other times my wishes and desires are lost in a black hole, until my physical environment show me the results in time. We get what we are, not what we want. It takes much awareness and effort to know yourself truly. Luckily, dreaming provides some comfort and certainty on what is cooking inside the cauldron of our subconscious.
I have 3 consecutive dreams this week about finding my room. In the first dream, I see my room is filled with unused desks from the classroom of my old design school. I find them cluttered the space but I feel I might find them useful one day. Then I see my mother sitting on a desk with the first edition of Macintosh. I ask her why she is using such an old computer, she said well it's still working. I woke up knowing the room is my body also the structure of my life and I need to clear out the things I don't need as well as the old programmings from my mother. So in imagery I cleared everything and redecorated my room the way I want it and asked mom nicely to leave.
The following night the dream showed me my mother and sisters have taken rooms in a not so nice traditional Japanese guest house and I now have to freedom to find myself another room. But I feel guilty that I am not staying at the same place as my family. From this dream I understand that the belief system that I have to endure something not so nice is rooted from the family belief that women should conform and endure. I now have the freedom to choose better but I am emotionally attached to the old way, feeling that I am betraying my family if I live better than them. So I repaired the image by finding myself a new hotel room which is modern and creative.
The third dream I see myself telling my parents I am taking a nice sunny room on the ground level in the family house instead of a small room in the underground. And I meet my teacher Catherine in the room and she asks me if I read tarot cards. I said I read a little and she asks me to go deeper to develop my intuition. So in 3 days I am able to see clearly where I have shifted and how things are moving inside. The physical manifestation is this post I am writing. 😊
前天我敬愛的老師Catherine Shainberg博士在督導班上給了我一個『A-ha』時刻。 她說物質在顯化之前，一切皆是能量。 在這個過程之間則是圖像。 如我們聽音樂時，圖像會不由自主地浮現於我們的腦海中。 這對我來說是一個頓悟。 也就是說，我們無論通過五官體驗到什麼，在我們內化了這些體驗之後，圖像便會出現。 換句話說，圖像是能量和顯化之間的界面。
自2011年以來，我一直修習著各種靈性和能量療法系統，但我覺得在療癒過程中總是缺乏了某些東西。這不是對任何系統的批評，只是我自身經驗的個人觀察。在使用這些系統時，目標是從源頭上去改變能量。我們總會用樹的比喻向學生和個案來解釋。我們（或我們的問題、身體症狀和創造）是樹的葉子、果實、花和樹幹。如果我們只去解決症狀，就像只切斷葉子和樹幹，留著完整的根部，會再長出同一棵樹來。因此，我們必須直接切斷樹的根源，並消除導致症狀的原因。這些系統非常有效地運作，使我們認出不同的程式、模式、信仰系統和觀點的根源，這些通常都是從過去世、祖先的血脈和童年經歷中帶來的。同樣的邏輯，我們要留意自己正在振動什麼樣的能量於想要顯化的目標和創造上。這就是我發現有所缺乏的地方。我努力地清理並轉化了負能量，然後期望會出現正面的結果。有時轉化是瞬間出現的，但有時我的願望和期待會消失於黑洞中，直到物質環境向我顯示結果。我們是什麼就會得到什麼，結果不一定是我們想要的。去了解真實的自己需要很多覺知和努力。幸運的是，夢能為我們在潛意識的大鍋裡正在煮著什麼提供了一些安慰和確定。
這個星期我連續3天夢到自己在找房間。在第一個夢中，我看到我的房間擺滿了以前在設計學院教室裡沒有用的設計桌。我發現它們塞滿了這個空間，但我覺得有一天它們可能有用。然後我看到我媽媽坐在桌子上使用第一版的蘋果電腦。我問她為什麼要使用這麼舊的電腦，她說因為它還能用。我醒來知道房間是我的身體也是我生活的結構，我需要清除我不需要的東西以及我母親的舊程式。因此，在視覺心像中，我清理了所有家俱，並按照我想要的方式重新裝修我的房間，並請媽媽離開。
第二天晚上，我夢到我的母親和姐姐們在一間不太舒適的傳統日式旅館裡定了房間，我有自由重新幫自己去找另一個房間。但我感到內疚，因為我並沒有和我的家人住在不太好的地方。從這個夢中我明白到，我必須忍受不好的事物的這個信念系統源於家族認為女性應該順從和忍受的信念。我現在擁有了選擇更好的自由，但我情緒上依戀於舊的方式，認為如果我比她們生活得更好，我便背叛了家人。所以在視覺心像中我通過找到一個現代和有創意的新酒店房間來修復圖像。
第三天晚上的夢，我看到自己告訴父母，我要在家裡地面上一個陽光充足的房間，而不是在地𥥖裡的小房間。我在房間裡遇見我的老師Catherine，她問我是否懂解讀塔羅牌。我說我懂一點，她叫我更深入地好好發展我的直覺。因此，在三天內，我能夠清楚看到我在那裡轉化了以及自己內在的移動方式。而物質的顯化就是我寫的這篇文章。😊
